Time alone
I'm bored.
There's nothing to do.
Every parent knows the sound of these statements, just like a siren of an emergency vehicle on the highway, and our reaction to both is critical!
What do you, dear parent, do when you are bored? "Right Jeanette, I wish! I haven't been bored since 2006." I hear you. We have busy lives as parents, employees, employers, spouses, and all the other titles we hold. Think for a minute about what you would do if you had an unexpected 3 hour block of time. If taking a nap (crucial, but not what we are talking about here) wasn't on the menu, what would you do?
Grab your phone and play _______ for three hours? Call your best friend? Clean your house? Read an actual book? Create something? Paint your nails? Go for a drive? Work in your yard? Bake a special treat? You have many options. As adults we know what we can and can't do with our "spare" time, and how to craft our day to make "spare" time happen. It helps to round out what our day looks like, and gives our lives variety.
NEWSFLASH
Life sometimes can be unscripted, boring, and even unexpectedly exciting.
We are doing our children a disservice by scheduling every moment of their day. "Free time" is not a time that they stop learning. This is the precious time of the day that homeschooling can REALLY take off. Kids can pursue interests that may have been presented during lesson time. Perhaps they can investigate on their own the mystery of the backyard, create a story on their own, build the most amazing Lego creation in the history of Lego creations. Maybe, they can have the time, on their own to let their imagination run while. If you happen to hear little voices conversing under the kitchen table, it may be 4 pencils decided where to go on their next adventure. Imagination is a muscle that needs to be flexed!
Schedule free time into your day, let you kids no when they are "on their own". This will help them to think of things they would like to do, when they are "in charge". Let them know what time it will be, and how long it will last. If you have more than one child, this time can be a collaborative time, the more imagination the better.
When my kids were toddlers/ young (non readers) we made a flip photo album 4x6 size, we called it the "boredom book". I photographed them doing things they loved to do, and ALSO things that needed be done that may not fall into the "fun and games" category. Here is an example of the things they could find to do; play cards, read a book, make your bed, color a picture, build with Legos, play with dolls, create a doll house from shoe boxes, make a card to mail to a friend or loved one, play in the yard/park, listen to music/dance, build a pillow fort, build a table fort, clean your room (more fun than it sounds), have a tea party, read or look at books. Unrestricted time to adventure where their minds lead them, is not time wasted but time training those minds to create.
Free time vs Quiet time.
The above are examples of FREE time, messy, chaotic, and full of imagination. If someone should happen to stop by during a free time block at my house, the look of shock and awe is undeniable. "Wow" "What on earth are you all doing?" "Is this... a bad time? I can...come back later." These are the kinds of comments that our free time circus would elicit.
QUIET time is a horse of a different color. No matter what number of children you have, being alone is an occurrence that will happen in their lives. Sticking with the theme that we are training our kids to be functioning members of society, it would be logical that we would coach them through this situation as well. Infants and toddlers (in my opinion) need naps. They process so much new information every day, SO MUCH. A huge quantity of this information is brand new to them, this can be exhausting to the brain, and body as well. Down time in the afternoon is a great time to reset, process and just rest. Once this happens the afternoon can be faced with new gusto and enthusiasm. "BUT THEY WON'T SLEEP AT NIGHT" While this may be true for your child, and your household, this has not been the case for my 7 kids. Perhaps an earlier time would work better, I will grant you that a "nap" at 5pm will derail bedtime like nobody's business! As kids get older, this "nap" time can be a great time for reading whatever books they choose, or quietly playing with building components or dolls etc. Just be sure the parameters are clear. Are the kids to stay on their beds? Just in their room or quiet space? Music? Silence?
For us it was in your room, on your bed, no noise. Building and reading was fine, drawing was good too. Here's the deal. Everyone needed to reset, and be alone with their thoughts, to process the day so far. If anyone was actually tired and needed to sleep that was easy to accommodate in this setting. As a stay at home teaching mom with 6 kids from infant to 10 years old, I needed 1-2 hours with no noise to be the best mom I could be in the evening. If this didn't happen, the afternoon was less than pleasant for us all.
Our children shared bedrooms until they were teens and we relocated. So "alone" space was a corner here, a tented bunk, a pillow under the kitchen table, wherever each kid could have some solo time.
Bottom line for us, is boredom is not the enemy. Stretch that mind and create your own fun, that is one of the benefits that comes with the freedom with homeschooling.
~Jeanette
